There was once a time when I believed that buying a new item of clothing, treating myself to a coffee, or spending huge amounts of money on a meal out would make me happy. And temporarily, they did. The thing is, I can remember buying clothes, purchasing coffee, going out for meals, but no item of clothing, no coffee, and no meal stands out as my happiest moment. I would spend hours on this pursuit of happiness, trying to compensate for the uncomfortable emotions swirling around my head and body.
For me, all those material items were a coping mechanism for how I was actually feeling. Rather than acknowledging I had severe anxiety and was completely overwhelmed, I would try to push it to one side in the hopes of finding happiness. When a box is full and you keep filling it with items, the box will eventually break. My anxiety was the box, and my emotions were the items. One day, I broke. Everything I was trying to keep contained and under control came spilling out.
I had to discard the broken box and begin to organise all the emotions inside. I feared those emotions; I didn't want to explore why I was angry or why I was sad; I just wanted to feel happy. The truth is, to understand happiness, I had to understand why I was anxious, had chronic worry and overwhelmed. I didn't want it to be messy or hard. I had let my emotions build and build until I was at the bottom and had no choice but to sift through the broken pieces of my life. It was my dark night of the soul.
Breathwork has many benefits, but the number one thing it's given me is emotional resilience. When we are anxious and overwhelmed, we release adrenaline, cortisol, and norepinephrine—these are all stress-related hormones. These hormones trigger a fight or flight response. Our muscles tense, and over time, this tension can cause chronic pain. Have you ever complained of neck, back pain, or shoulder pain? Perhaps you have acid reflux or stomach pains. Your body really does know the score and these could all be severe anxiety symptoms.
Emotional resilience is the ability to respond to stressful, unexpected situations, and crises. In the UK, 74% of people are overwhelmed. That's a huge percentage of people who don't feel emotionally resilient. I don't want anyone to have to reach a point where they're completely broken to have to build themselves up again. Most people live on the teetering edge where any moment an unexpected situation could push them. It really doesn't have to be that way. For me, the secret lies in your breath—a safe space to feel, release, and explore whatever is going on. Deep breathing exercises can regulate the release of stress hormones and dissolve tension held in the body and muscles.
I was able to find what truly makes me happy. It may sound cliché, but it's a sunset. When I watch the sun go down, I'm reminded that life is short but can also be beautiful.
If you want anxiety help that actually works then drop me a message.
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